My little brother got into outer space and stuff so my step-mom bought him a place mat with all the planets on it. When I first saw it, I was upset, because it was newer and so Pluto wasn’t labeled. I was about to say something when I noticed something…
Pluto is there.
The artist remembered Pluto.
Guys…
The artist drew Pluto crying.
(Source: rubywhiterabbit, via canthearthemusic)
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I would have been yours already.
In a perfect world, we’d be officially together. I would be able to go out with you as much as I would like to without having to fear my mother’s incessant questions about what we’re going to do and without her doubting our intentions.
We’d be able to stay out late, just you and me, standing by your balcony, watching the city lights be engulfed by the city lights as the time passes by us without warning. I would lean on you, with your arms around me, not thinking of anything else beyond you and me being together. Not time, not anything could separate us.
We could watch a movie together with our hands intertwined together. Watch a horror movie with my hands over my face and you laughing at me because I couldn’t handle the gore. Watch a comedy and laugh our heads off. Watch a romantic movie and let you wrap your arm around me, just like they do in those television shows. Nothing malicious. Nothing even closely sexual about it, as other people would have us believe. Just you and I enjoying movies, because both of us are probably the biggest movie whores in the world.
I could sleep on your lap as you sit on our couch while we’re watching whatever’s on. You can play with my hair, hold my hand, even give me a small kiss on the forehead every now and then. My dad may look at us occasionally with a glare that tells us, “I’m watching you sweetie, don’t even dare do something remotely naughty”, but eventually, he’ll soften up and learn to trust his little princess with you.
But this isn’t a perfect world. We can’t be together. Not yet.
We’re physically separated from one another, having to attend universities placed conveniently far from each other. I’m North, you’re South. College will kill us both, and we will have less time with each other. The texts will come in infrequently. Calls would be more convenient during the night. We’ll have to save money because college is a very expensive thing. We’d both sleep at night, knowing that, instead of a bridge, highways and endless roads separate us both.
I’m so rarely allowed to go out. And even if I am, it has to be strictly under supervision, because we’re not yet trusted alone. And truth is, they’re scared to let me go, their little princess, because they think I’m not mature enough to handle the pain of being in a relationship.
This isn’t a perfect world, and we both have to suffer pain because of it.
But I don’t regret anything.
Sure, I want them all. I want us to be able to go out as much as possible. I want to do all those things with you. But if it were a perfect world, would you still regard me the way you do? If I were exactly the same as every one of your previous girlfriends, would I be any more special? If I were able to go out with you every time you wanted us too, wouldn’t you tire of my company?
If I weren’t so strictly supervised, would you bother facing my parents just to spend a little time with me?
If this was a perfect world without us having any problem, would you love me this way? Would you think I was worth all the trouble? Would you go to the same painstaking effort?
This isn’t a perfect world, I know.
But you know what makes it so much better?
It’s the fact that, through everything, you fought for me. You thought I was special. You made me see everything I was worth even if I didn’t see it myself. You loved me in a way I never thought anybody would ever bother to love me.
It’s the fact that, in this strangely imperfect world, one thing was right.
You.
74 By GABY DUNN
What if, in another universe, I deserve you?
Hear me out. There’s this philosopher from the 1890s named William James, and he coined this theory about “the multiverse” which suggests that a hypothetical set of multiple universes comprises everything that can possibly exist simultaneously.
Are you following? The entirety of space, time, matter and energy is all happening at once in different timelines: It’s the idea of parallel universes. Right? So okay, let’s presume the multiverse is real.
Well then, maybe somewhere in those infinite universes is one, or several, where I deserve you.
Maybe there’s a universe out there — happening now — where we end up together and when I close my eyes at night, I’m not dreaming the way a normal person would. Instead I’m seeing flashes of our lives in the multiverse. They’re not simple dreams because I miss you, right? They’re scientific, anachronistic visions.
For instance:
In this universe, I don’t want a family, but maybe in another, I’m more of the type to settle down. Maybe there’s a universe where you hold my hand while I give birth to our daughter in a white hospital room with pink flowers and fuzzy teddy bears on the window sill. Where we take family vacations and pose for dorky pictures in our neon bathing suits on the sands of a Florida beach. Where we curl up to watch a cheesy movie at the end of a long day in our big, green, suburban house once the kids have fallen asleep.
Maybe there’s a universe where we are middle-aged and taking our child to college and bickering over where to put her dresser or what posters she should hang up. Where you kiss her on the forehead ‘goodbye’ and we drive home in contented, proud silence, your fingers grazing my knuckles, our wedding rings glistening. Where we both have gray hair and we laugh and smile and hug and drink lemonade on the porch.
Maybe there’s a universe where that’s the life I want. Where I don’t second guess everything and I’m not afraid of commitment and of the future and of love. Maybe there’s a universe without all the noise in my head and the pride that makes me so fiercely independent and the coldness in my heart that I can turn on and off like a security fence.
Maybe there’s a universe where I’m the right person for you. Where I adore every nice thing you did for me without starting to resent you. A universe where you actually end up with someone who appreciates you. Where no one becomes a doormat. Where both of us can shed our baggage and curiosity and issues. A universe where we’re happy — without wondering if that happiness is some messed-up Jenga game ready to topple at the slightest quiver. A universe where we’re comfortable and sure, and we have cats.
Maybe there’s a universe where we fall asleep next to each other every night like spoons, like two innocent bunnies — my face buried in your neck, hugging your warmth — and we both don’t want anything or anybody else. Where we don’t want more, we just want each other.
Maybe there’s a universe where I don’t covet so much all the time and where I’m content and where I don’t wonder about picking up and moving to Japan without saying anything to anyone and where at this very juncture, I can just know I’ll always want to come home and cook dinner with you.
If you think of it all this way, then it’s like neither of us did anything wrong.
You just found me in the wrong universe. That’s all. This is, as they say, the darkest timeline. Everywhere else, nay, “everywhen” else — us in the Civil War, us in Ancient Egypt, us in the swinging ’60s — we are happy.
If this theory holds, well, by the law of averages, there had to be one universe — just this one — where we don’t end up together. Here and now just happens to be it. If you think of it this way, nothing is our fault.
So see, that explains everything. We’re not together anymore because of the multiverse.
Well, isn’t that comforting?
If you’re sad, do like I do and just think of the other ‘verses. The ones where I believe in love and where I don’t hate myself and where I never feel the need to kamikaze relationships. A universe where we can have nice things. It’s helpful, right?
Because you could have loved me forever. And maybe in another universe, I let you.
(via thunderpopcola)
366 
I have this analogy that, in life, we all start at the top of a sphere. Upon each side of lies a different personality. At the very top, we have the ability to fall any which way on that ball. One decision can cause us to change the course of our entire path down it’s sides. Which side of that sphere you fall on is almost completely reliant on the decisions your parents make and the impact that your surroundings have on you early on. The longer you’re alive, however, the more your own decisions affect the course of your ‘ball’ (as seen in the elaborate MS paint artwork above). Unfortunately, the more aware and in control we are of our decisions and surroundings, the later it is in life (and the further down the ball we are); making it more difficult to alter the course of our own developing character/personality.
115 
This afternoon, I have come full circle. 24 years ago when I was in kinder I gave the valedictory address to the kinder graduates of the T. Alonzo Elementary School in Project 4. I did not go to that school, my mother’s sister was the kinder teacher and she hired me to deliver the valedictory address. I was given sorbetes for my services. I thank the Asian Center and Tri-college Ph.D. Philippine programme for giving me the opportunity to deliver the speech in behalf of the graduating class this year, for real. I am not sure if I will receive sorbetes after my speech, but I am certain that this will be more memorable for me than the one I gave in kinder.
When I was informed that I will be giving the speech, I asked if there is a particular theme that I should work with and I was told there is none. For many days I contemplated on what I will say this afternoon. I thought I’d give an academic speech, talk about the economic, political, cultural and social problems of our nation and how these are related to the conditions of our Asian neighbors. I decided against it because, I thought this afternoon, what I want to share with you is about love.
I decided to tell you about UP Aking Mahal.
If there is one thing in my life that remains constant – it is my love for UP. I have spent more than half of my life in U.P. as an undergrad student, an MA student, a young instructor, a PhD student, a campus resident, and now as an associate professor.
But we all know UP is not easy to love, UP can break your heart in so many ways. I know, because it has broken mine several times. For instance, I applied as an instructor three times at the Department of Art Studies and three times, I was rejected.
Pursuing my Ph.D. in Philippine Studies gave me a lot of heartaches. The years I spent working on it were some of the most trying times in my life. The 2 years I devoted to writing my dissertation were arguably the most difficult - so many long, lonely, sleepless nights coupled with physical pain, mental anguish, and emotional torment. Had I known it would be that difficult, I would not have embarked on the Ph.D. in the first place. But I persisted. I kept reminding myself – “para sa UP ito.” I did it not only for myself but for UP Aking Mahal.
I thought when I finished my Ph.D. everything would be better. I could not be more wrong. In fact, after my Ph.D., I was depressed and heartbroken as several trials tested my love for UP. I kept asking myself – why do I stay in UP?
I thought long and hard, I agonized, I had lengthy heated discussions with my partner, friends, and colleagues trying to find the answer to my question. Ultimately, I arrived at a singular conclusion - I love UP.
I love the students who fuel my passion for teaching and learning; the hours spent inside the classroom with them rejuvenate me. My fellow professors continue to inspire me to teach. I love the beautiful UP campus that has been my home for the past 6 years. I love the history of UP – its 100 years of excellence in the service of the nation.
I love how UP gives an impoverished young man the chance to become a genius and how it transforms a young woman into an architecture board topnotcher and a beauty queen (she was my student by the way).
I realized that my love for UP is inevitably linked to my love for country. It is by choice that I stay in the country. It is also by choice that I teach in UP because it is here in UP, where I continue to hope, that in a seemingly small way, I, as a teacher contribute in making the Philippines a better place. Because it is here in UP where I have the distinct opportunity to teach the country’s best and the brightest minds and take part in shaping them into critical thinkers and leaders of this country. This is my service to UP and country. This is how I embody the spirit of the Oblation and the ideals of U.P. - service, leadership, and excellence.
Undoubtedly, my many years in U.P. have awakened a deeper understanding and love for country. In particular, the Ph.D. Philippine studies program equipped me with a more critical understanding of the complex history, political landscape, and cultural terrain of the country. The knowledge I gained in this program made me a better teacher and a better Filipino.
At this point, I would like to share something I wrote for my graduating students in 2006. Now, this message is not just for my students but also for you my fellow graduates and for myself, so that I will always be reminded of the reasons that make me stay in UP.
” To all new graduates – congratulations! Enjoy this day. This is important to your parents, family, and significant others. Be proud, you now join the ranks of great thinkers, movers, and leaders of our country. You are now part of the great UP tradition. The legacy left to us by the best and brightest of the past. Do not do anything to taint this legacy.
Fellow Iskolar ng bayan, as you begin to embark on your quest to earn your millions and live comfortable lives, in your haste to go to foreign lands to earn big bucks and drive big cars, I beg you - do not forget the people who sent you to school. Do not forget the taxpayers who toil everyday to pay for your tuition. Do not forget the people who gave you the opportunity to be iskolar ng bayan.
Mga iskolar ng bayan, huwag kalimutang pagsilbihan ang bayan.
UP FIGHT!
(Speech delivered at the graduation of the Ph.D. Philippine Studies Program, Tri-college, Asian Center, April 2011.)
(Source: badassprof)
62 42575 6019 12165 She was everything poetry yearned
Carved perfection dancing in silver liningsShe was broken and beautiful
Silent and strong
A whisper in the breeze
That blew me away
I found the sun on a cold winter’s day.The world was my canvas
The amber pools of her eyes, my inkBoundaries and borders didn’t exist,
There was no room for regret.Night came
But darkness didn’tAnd the stars meant nothing in her light.
The pages of our realities folded together
We were invincible.And what you can’t do with a broken heart,
You can do with two.
(Source: messagestothemoon)
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